Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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