dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I stole a fireplace last night.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
