do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize