he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
