with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
