someone threw a dead crab at me
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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