i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
