No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
