Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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