I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
