walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You are the jesus of drinking
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
