If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize