I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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