And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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