it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I had to cum in my sink.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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