your room smells of hookers.
And success
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
