I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
