I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
