she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize