I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
