she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
