He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
