Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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