I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
