He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Randomize
