she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
