ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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