I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
