Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+44): View more from England

No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet

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(304): View more from West Virginia

hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy

Fav 11 4302 1687
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(802): View more from Vermont

I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

did mom hear me barking???

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

sooo high. sooo many dog friends

Fav 7 3958 1091
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(845): View more from New York

That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...

Fav 3 2478 1016
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(520): View more from Arizona

We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.

Fav 2 279 102
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(870): View more from Arkansas

Let the record show that I hate your ass.

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