the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
