Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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