My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
