If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
