Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize