Will you blow on my dice?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
