I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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