she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I queefed so loud it echoed.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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