Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
