At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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