Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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