The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
did you get engaged???
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
