I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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