like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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