I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
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