There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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