4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I'm going to jail i love you
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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