She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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