I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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