We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
