I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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