I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
